Well here it is. What you have all been waiting for. BDC is finally attempting to blog. I love talking about myself in the third person. Makes me feel more important than I'm sure I really am. Why is that so empowering? I don't know but I like it a lot.
I was recently at my wife's baby shower when some of the lady's there started shouting "BDC BDC BDC" and for some reason that made me feel more, manly. Wait I know the jokes are already coming. Why was I at the shower to begin with right? Well the answer is because there were lots of women there and they seem to like me. Okay that's not true I was there to pick up one of my three sons. Yes I can say my three sons and it’s not only awesome but it’s true.
So I was at my wife's baby shower to pick up women and my son when my adoring female fans started to chant my abbreviated namesake and I realized that people really do read this stuff, even people I know. Now I think I was most shocked that I actually know people that can read, but also I thought it was pretty cool too. So I started thinking about giving this writing stuff a shot. I am not always a man of many words. Often I just mumble things under my breath and wait for someone to ask me what's wrong. Being prone to depression doesn't help much with that but my wife always helps me with that and sets me straight. "Sweet heart you need to get in a better mood or I am going to bury your corpse in the back yard and find a new husband" tends to be a good motivator.
The really weird thing is that when I drink I seem to get in a much better mood. No matter how bad things get liquid truth tends to make things better. This is completely backwards from the rest of my family but that's another story. Bacardi 151 and a splash of coke is my chosen serum. People call it jet fuel. The way I drink it is apparently unusual. Bartenders always ask if I know what the hell I am ordering. They offer me water to go with it which I find insulting. I started drinking liquid truth after gaining about a hundred pounds and realizing the regular stuff was not enough to do the trick anymore. When my family knows I have had a bad day or am depressed about things in general they sometimes meet me at the door with a drink and tell me to drink it fast so they can make me another.
Strange I know. I may be the only person I've ever heard of that is encouraged to be a drunk. I am not a drunk though. I don't want you to get the wrong impression. This is not a nightly thing with me. Every couple of weeks or so is good enough to keep me going. I never want to be the Dad that loses his wife or kids to the bottle. Of course I am sure nobody wants to be that guy. All things in moderation, or whatever that saying is.